Adventures in Urbania - Episode 2

Once again the door is open. A car screeches to a halt in front of the building. A ghetto white trash chick gets out wearing flip flops and goes running upstairs. Suddenly there is pounding. More pounding. Then boyfriend in the still-running car yells, "C'mon! She ain't home!"

GWTC's response: "She said she would [expletive] be here! Why isn't she answering the phone?! Ahh! I know she's in there! I'm just gonna kick down this [bleeping] door!! [SWEAR!] I don't have the right [curse word] shoes to kick down this [edited for the children] door!! I want my knives back!!!"



I have no words.

Comments

Megan said…
"I want my knives back!" Hee. I think I'll start muttering this under my breath. Like, in the drive-thru or Wal-Mart check out lines.

Will you bail me out if things go south?
September 28, 2009 at 9:34 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I Stand All Amazed

This may not make sense. It's jumbled. But sometimes you just need to write. Or blog. And so you do. I love when stories just flow out of me. When I don't have to wrack my brain and consider this and that, and wonder about the other, and then go back and make sure that everything is plausible, or realistic, or coming across the way that I want. When I just sit down, and the words just pour forth, like a cup running over. That's been happening to me recently on some pieces I'm working on and I'm quite pleased. Interestingly, and maybe not by chance, these pieces are ones I've been doing by hand. I wrote 1600 words, and then another 1200, and then a third set I've yet to transcribe into type. But it's the old writing - the way writing used to be for me. The joy is there, and that's so, so important to me. I can't boil it down into a sure-fire recipe, but I know enough to know when I can put my thumb on it; and this is working. I hate how sloppy...
Read more

articles of 2011

Ever since 2009 when I claimed to not read articles, and then 2010 when I acknowledged that I started reading , I've been thinking about articles. Because I read A TON of them. So for this year's best of, I wanted it to be harder to choose (and it will be). I started tracking the articles I perused. Granted, I wasn't super diligent about it, so this list isn't wholly representative... but I think I did a pretty good job. So disclaimers: No guarantee any links will work. Not a comprehensive list. Don't read if there's going to be something that offends you. Articles of 2011 included: Movement to restore children's play Zodiac sign hasn't changed ONE PERIOD DAMMIT Women obsessed with LDS blogs Mormonism: room for everyone? Serenity/Firefly after Mormons and Iomega Disney ditching princesses 11 Things to Know at 25(ish) NEI Responds to AP Article Utah braces for floodings as hot temps melt snowpack Scientists create first memory expansion for brain Toddler...
Read more

Sunday School Moments - I

Okay so very recently I've been called to teach at my church. Primary. LOL I have a class with a 9-yr. old, five 10-yr. olds, and an 11-yr. old. Eesh. So some of my blogs will be about the random/funny things they say. Because, they're kids, people. And kids are freaking hilarious. Episode 1: Life Goal I want our class to be as fun as possible. I mean, kids love having fun! So I wanted to take a few minutes and get to know the kids a little better in order to cater the class more specifically to their likes and wants. So I made up this little questionnaire I had them fill out with questions like, "Favorite Color," "Something you're afraid of," "Favorite scripture story," "A game you'd love to play in class," etc. So they are penciling away at these things and I'm writing my own on the chalkboard so they know me. Well the 9-year old looks up and raises her hand. Me: "Yes?" Her: "I don't know what to put for t...
Read more